The World Keeps Turning

Here I am, sitting at work, pretending to give a shit about all of this stuff that seems so unimportant.  How is it that the world just keeps on going?  I know that it is crucial that I keep moving so that I don't get "stuck" in all of this emotional shit.  I don't want to lose the memories.  i don't want to let go.  I don't want to face the reality of moving on without him. I'm still wearing my dirty pyjamas and holding tight to his blanket because I can smell him.  I can't face going back in to my cabin yet.  I can't imagine a time when home will feel like home again.  Spankee is everywhere, and this hurts and this is wonderful.